Tuesday, February 28, 2006

KFC Snackers Rule!

The joy. The delight. It is unimaginable.

My humans left a special treat for me on the counter. It was a KFC Snacker. At first I did not realize that it was there.....but then ever so softly I heard it calling. It said in its seductive sandwich voice "Bartholomeu, I am for you." It was like the "That Which Survives" episode of the original Star Trek. Only this time the sandwich was not named Losira and it wasn't trying to kill me. Thank goodness my KFC snacker didn't end up to be a holographic projection either!

No, my snacker was very, very real. Then it slid down my throat so smoothly I didn't even have to chew.

Now, why did my favorite human check my breath when I was done? You just have to wonder what these humans are thinking sometimes.

-Bart

Monday, February 13, 2006

He needed some exercise anyway.

I've been busy lately. As I have mentioned before, we're down one dog in our pack. A situation my agent needs to rememdy. Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and maybe he'll bring a puppy for my favorite human.

The wolfhounds are such slackers that I am left to do all the work. Whether it is chasing the cat, cleaning the stove, sink, dishes, etc. Okay, so the hounds will stare at the cat over the gate. But, they won't go for her.

Which reminds me......I kind of like the cat. She's so very attractive. Did I mention she looks like me? Yes. Black with brindling.....though in cats I guess they call that tortoise shell. I have to wonder about that (and maybe ask Mytrle, as the tortoise is a cousin of hers, I believe).

So, while I am doing all the work around here (like a modern day Cinderella), I noticed a couple things. One is that Brogan was looking a little soft and out of shape. The other is my agent was deluded into thinking he had Bart-proofed the gate.

It was a beautiful Sunday morning. The country landscape was covered in snow and it looked so inviting. There's no better time than the present. I nosed the gate and with a little brute force had it opened enough to SQUEEZE out. Oh, the sweet taste of freedom! Brogan was a willing participant in the escape. On the other hand, Sabrina was annoyed and barked her fool head off. TATTLE-TALE! If it hadn't been for her we might have gotten much farther away from the house before anyone noticed.

We were off! I ran around the house a few times to warm old Brogan up. Then down the road and across the bridge (so we didn't have to tramp through the creek). Next it was up the hill on the snowmobile trail.

Brogan was keeping up with me, which is pretty surprising since he's really a geezer in wolfhound years. I'm not sure how many miles we ran, but it was GREAT!

Now this story does have a down side. Apparently I stressed out my favorite human as she wasn't so confident that I could take care of myself and Brogan out in the "wild." I'm really sorry I did that. I never like to see her cry. I also didn't want her angry with my agent either.
She sort of blamed him for the gate thing. I don't know why she did that. When I want out, I get out. Next time I'll have to do it in such a way that my agent is held blameless.

The upside to the story is that my agent had to walk the snowmobile trail too!!! This was so good for him. It was as if I killed two birds with one stone. Brogan and my agent both got plenty of exercise.

My agent finally caught up with us. We were so happy to see him! Especially because we ended up getting a ride home. I could have run all the way home, but Brogan was looking spent.

Once home we spent the afternoon napping. Can you think of a better way to spend a day??

-Bart